1392 Nineteen hours

6am. Having risen three times, discontented but familiar waking dreams, I rise sleepily and play games for 35 minutes with continuing a chess winning streak, level two, to 35 games and Keeping my short run of Hearts at 21% , alternative over the week with 20% but not lower, then work on the overnight Blog before concentrating on the in tray and decide to write the day as the hours which is the basic construction of the work which governs my life now.

7am. Continued writing and then stop for coffee and two toasts. I am satisfied with the rewrite.

8am The writing is almost done but I break to put out the wheelie bin and to water those plants under cover and which do not get rain. I consider getting a water barrel for one of the corners nearest the house. That would be an environmentally friendly decision and could add to savings when I arrange the water meter good. As a consequence of watering there is water down one sleeve so I need to change the jackets I tend to wear in house saving shirts for when I go out. It is a damp cold morning which lowers spirits.

9am. I have commenced some work. Last night I had a horrendous time with the printer as four cartridges had to be changed in three separate instances and this led to some not being recognised and other issues which was frustrating and irritating. I complete a Culture 2008 set and upload and print the Blog and decided on another coffee before tackling the communications in tray. The spirit is low and I am already physically tired from being up so early.

10am. Spirits raised by listening to Andrew Marr's Start of the Week on BBC 4because of the contribution of two writers. I miss the first part of the programme where the conversation appears to have been about the long of Iranian middle class culture. I first listen to an English liberal environmentalist who has written a story about an American from Wyoming, born on the freeway, spending his youth with cattle and horses and then goes into oil drilling as his father and grandfather had done only to die with a small reference in the local paper along with three others and leads the author to investigate what happened and his life, and to create what is said to be a powerful work reproducing the speech and thought patterns of the community, a good feat for an English woman

What attracts my attention is the description of once open wild landscape which is now said to take only half a day to cross because the rest has given way to intense drilling for oil and gas such is the U.S response to the real global challenge with is not in fact global warming but the demand for energy. The programme stops at this point to continue the literary discussion. I switch off mentally to consider the irony, the horrendous poetically justice of western capitalism so intent on expanding markets to increase profits and destroy communism that it had created new monster economies which will quickly subordinate those economies which do not have their own energy resources to meet domestic demand.

The second writer, also a musician, comes from India and is attempting to redefine and progress his cultural identity from the post colonial position of the past decades into the new India which is re-establishing its ancient history and making constructive use of the colonial legacy. He conjured what is likely to remain the best concept for many a day The Empire writes back.

On a different note, I receive invitations to order Mediterranean and Asian meals for home delivery about once a week. This time it was from Danaroso in Fredericke Street, over a mile away whereas I have over half a dozen take away and deliverers of meals 100 to 150 yards away. I have to spend over £9 to get free delivery. It is wasteful marketing but suggests desperation through overprovision at a time when everyone is looking at ways to save money. Later going through the box I come across another offer of the delivery of Chinese food, also from Fredericke Street.

11am Progress is slow even with a second cup of coffee. I am reminded of when I worked in an office for most of the day and hated having to tackle the delay my own personal in-tray, although I had full control over the amount of the and nature of its content, as the decision to allocate work, including the incoming communications was mine.

I had quickly learnt that in a situation where politicians expected you to know everything of relevance to their interests there were three methods for ensuring that you were not caught out. The first was to quickly read through the morning papers, the Journal and the Northern Echo and two evening papers, the Newcastle Chronicle and the Shields Gazette. I also had delivered to my home the Sunderland Echo. I could have asked someone else to go through the papers for me, but I knew better than anyone else what issues would be of interest to Councillors and what issues might be raised by colleagues in other departments of the local authority, together to those issues which were of other importance. I had also learnt the value of keeping one eye on the hatches, matches and dispatches.

The second method was to see all the incoming post and copies of all Headquarters' post sent out by management. I had learnt the need to do this from the first head I had worked for although she went further and insisted on receiving copies of the notes required on all phone calls and which because she was away a lot from holding a national position she would work through a pile of 1000 messages at a time. I did not open the post myself and the preliminary allocation was made by administration, and after a couple of years or so it was rare for me to alter the allocations and I tried to avoid doing so as we kept a record of everything received and when and to whom it was allocated. This was important to avoid accusations that communications had been received and then lost but it was more important that I knew what everyone was doing and could reallocated if it became important to do so. The post trolley was then available for the rest of management to see what had come in and where allocated if they wished, and to collect, or have collected their individual in-coming mails. An additional copy of all outgoing mail was collated and then circulated to the senior management in rotation. No one could complain that that they were not kept informed. This was additional to the weekly Monday morning meeting to review the activities of the week ahead or the circulation of the weekly activities sheet in which we all listed our planned engagements. In addition to knowing who would be in the office and who would not, it ensured that we had one appropriate representative at every political and officer meeting when required or when we believe it was in the interests of our service to have representation. It also helped to avoid duplicating representation. The third method was keep a register of all formal complaints received throughout the department. This indicated the brief nature of the complaint, when it was received, who was investigating and responding and when the matter was dealt with. Any anonymous list was circulated to the Committee each month so Councillors could raise an issue if they wished although this rarely happened and most approached the officer dealing with the matter if the complainant raised concerns with individual councillors. I saw all replies where I had not asked to receive the draft and accompanying papers. Most of colleagues around the country did not pay similar attention to detail and some immediately passed on anything directed at them or arranged for their secretary or deputy to do so when they were absent from the department and relied on briefings when they returned to the office, or subordinate colleagues decided they should be briefed. The majority of these individuals failed to survive long although some did by concentrating on being loved, visiting their empire in much the same way royalty visits and responding to the enquiries of Councillors in such manner that they appeared to support everyone and every interest, so that when things went wrong there was always someone else to blame.

However this hands on approach meant that I had an active in tray which I would sort into priorities but then try and work through on a daily basis in so far as information was immediately available and did not have to be obtained from others. I was much happier when I was able to concentrate on one issue at a time rather than juggling through the wide variety of issue covering the interests of residential, day care, domiciliary and fieldwork, policy, finance, personnel and other administration issues and any of the client interests divided broadly between children, the elderly, mental and physical disabilities. It still amazes that I and others managed to overcome the handicap of being trained and working in only one aspect of a service jumping overnight into taking responsibility for one aspect and not another. I still prefer concentrating on one subject rather than going through an in tray which now covers only the range of personal, household, work and personal interest activities.

12 noon. I have sent a text for a new cheque book for the first time. I have sent my subscription and a support donation to the Calne, Wiltshire Heritage centre and advised of the death of my mother whose grandfather left the town in the 1865, three months after the deaths of his father and his mother to join a British Arm regiment the 29th of Foot. I also telephone to enquire why my subscription as a Friend of redeveloped Tyneside Cinema has not arrived. This reminds that yesterday evening there was an excellent programme about Television cities, an edition about Tyneside on TV and film. This included shots from the four Catherine Cookson films with scenes at Marsden Beach, Rocks and Grotto, including of before part of the arched rock became so dangerous that it had to be blown up. There was film and photos of the early days when the Grotto was developed into a living and working structure. There were shots of the Tyne Bridge, the Gateshead Car park and other scenes from Get Carter, including the final beach scene which the local council subsequently made into a naturist beach until local opposition made using the beach impossible. It was also one According to the film footage it was also one of the most inappropriate locations for such a beach in the North East. There was also the history of the two ships converted into a night club, two because the first was taken to Glasgow as an expansion while now 25 years later the lease of the second is not being renewed. I decide on an early lunch with the main course a stir fry using the rest of the shoulder of lamb. I have set aside until later in the month renewal of the House insurances.

1pm. I enjoyed making and eating the stir fry which contained the lamb, an onion and a yellow pepper, the remains of the tout mange and a good portion of the bean sprouts with sufficient left for another fry later in the week, noodles and chilli sauce. I watched Bargain Hunt and the news headlines which gave the impression that the Prime Minister Gordon aims to impose his authority on his Parliamentary colleagues through insisting on the change from detention without charge from 28 to 42 days in restricted circumstances involving reference to Parliament. It will be interesting to see how this works out now that the Members have returned to Westminster after visiting their constituencies.

Yves St Laurent has died at 71, another contemporary reminds me to make the most of the hours. There is a good piece in the Sun on line about the 14 year of winner of Britain's Got Talent where it is revealed that he was advised by Simon to redo the semi final routine after rehearsing new one. This confirms the extent to which the final show was controlled and possibly the outcome. The bank has Text back to confirm that new cheque book will be issued. I am impressed with that. The cost of my text 3p compared to 32p for a postage stamp. Ericksson is sacked by Man City which suggests that Mr Grant of Chelsea may be on his way there in the Merry Go Round, although the subsequent front runner is said to be Mr Hughes of Blackburn. The Sun also has a provocative headline that Kate Moss has lost her panties; that is her half a million a year contract with Agent Provocative underwear to a Brazilian socialite aged 17 years and with a ring through her nose. She has also lost contracts to Burberry and Yves St Laurent, The Sun tells her not to mind the loss of income in excess of 1.5 million a year as she can be expected to get the Coke contract. Ha Ha.

2pm Whereas the news is all about the credit crunch with the Bradford and Bingley showing a loss over the first quarter it shares falls again from 74 to 65 pence having been £4 a year ago, I received yet another invitation for a new special Credit Card. I took a break and did the washing up and then as it looked as if the Spring bulbs had dried out I commenced to cut away the dead growth but found that some water had crept in from table top spillages so the task could not be completed. I will leave sorting out the bulbs into their types later but given the increase in containers I envisage an additional supply in for next season. That is optimism.

3pm I have written before of the importance of having attended a Henley International Senior Management course in the mid 1980's and I continue to receive the annual invitation to Alumni member's annual garden party day which used to take place during Henley regatta week although as boat trips on the river Thames are mentioned this suggests a different time. There is Music on the Lawn, Tombola on the Terrace, a Pimms Bar, Strawberries and Cream, with a BBQ or Fish and Chips available noon until 3 and traditional cream scones tea available. There are the usual activities available of swimming, badminton, tennis, squash, boule and croquet and a number of activities for children including the Smartie Artie Magic and Puppet Show. The serious aspect of the newsletter is that the College has decided to become part of the University of Reading as its Henley Business School although the change will require approval of the Charity Commissioners and the Privy Council. I was also impressed to see that the chairs of the 23 branches of the International Alumni Association also had a meeting at the college, including from Malta. The black Tie annual Alumni Ball is to be held in October with tickets £100 and the evening aiming to raise £25000 for the Scholarship Fund. I was never actively involved in that world but my former involvement has become part of the fog of the past which I am now clearing.

4pm The first In-Tray going though was completed before four so I decided to see what was on TV while I sorted material suitable for set work from, material which was then junked, (the major amount), and from that held in trolley trays for possible future reference and that which still required some action. Yesterday I watched part of the Sign of the Four the Sherlock Holmes mystery and today I was able to see the rest while continuing to work completing some developments sets, start one for Durham Cricket some registration cards for a political record
5pm A cup of tea and slices of smoked salmon with lemon on Hovis bread before going to post the DVD's and the letter to the Calne Heritage centre. It is a fine evening but I had to drag myself up and out and decided against taking the rucksack for a supermarket visit I watch a familiar episode of PD James Inspector Dalglesh. I will go sometime tomorrow for rolls for Wednesday's quarter final at Chester Le Street. I forgot to mention yesterday day that Durham won the four day county game at Sussex in three days after a disastrous when they were 15 runs for wickets in reply to Sussex first Innings of over 200, however there was then a partnership of 200 between Smith and Blenkenstein, each getting a century. A Steve Harmison Hat Trick helped to reduce the Sussex second Innings to 212 which left Durham with just over 100 runs to win which they were able to achieve with difficulty thus bringing their second win of the season and a move to mid table with one or two game sin hand over those above, the position could improve again this weekend.

6 pm A glass of red wine and a small dish of peanuts. Among continuing work activities was the preparation a new composite ream of coloured cards. The standard ream is 250 with five colours but I also have older reams of single colours pastel shades, making a total of seven colours which I interspersed one of each colour to create a master ream of 500 which is used to stick on materials such as tickets, cut outs from used food packaging, notes, cuts out from newspapers which means something in terms of my day or days past. Of course this kind of montage making is old hat in terms of contemporary art, except that what I do represents my past in a considered way as well as my present. The Baltic is hold a SMART Arts course to help people understand what contemporary art is all about.

7pm The World's Got Talent. Piers Morgan has taken over the world as no sooner is his stint on Britain's Got talent finished does the American version appear on our screens this weekend where he is also one of the judges and then tonight he is hosting a collection of clips from the world wide programmes from Russia, Israel, Norway and lots from the USA. Some of the judges comments in the recent series are better understood as it is evident that many of the acts this season have followed on from those in other countries which featured last year. I eat a prepared small pasta dish with broccoli for tea

8 pm Ice cream and some work confidential.
9pm-11pm This is England Channel 4 film was being a shown on a day when yet another teenager is reported to have died in London from multiple stab wounds although in this instance a man twice her age rather than another teenager has been arrested. The death is but one of a succession of young lives brutally ends over the past two years and is symptomatic of a streak in English culture which has been there for generations and which boils over every few years or so and which is beyond sticking plaster political remedies and where punitive and custodial measures only enhance status and reinforce positioning within the under culture.

The film is an accurate portrayal of skin head, racist, football hooligan mentality and culture and contains an outstanding performance from a boy who was fourteen years of age Thomas Turgoose playing a twelve year old whose father was killed in the Falklands War and who is bullied at school. On such a day when he has been in a fight and given corporal punishment at school, he comes across and gang of older youths, including a mixed race lad and someone who is educationally disabled. They adopt the boy into the gang. He is given a skin head hair cut, a check shirt and braces and his mother is persuaded to buy him boots. The gang leader has a regular girl friend as does the mixed race lad and other girls associate themselves with the gang including a girl who appears to be much older than Thomas because of the extreme difference in heights as he is of small build and she is tall. She initiates him into a boy girl relationship and become his official girl friend. She is called Smell for Michelle.

Although the group drink and smoke they are relative harmless and offer Thomas considerable emotional support especially when they find out about the death of his dad. However everything changes when the former leader of the group returns from prison having done the time for a crime committed by the present gang leader and where we subsequently learn he had slept one night with the girl friend when she was only sixteen and drunk.
It is not evident the extent to which Combo (Stephen Graham) was already a violent man holding extreme right wing national front beliefs before going to prison but once out of prison he sets on taking over the gang and Thomas is one of those who join him and is taken to a National Front meeting held at a secret location. In response to the incitement of the meeting the new gang raid a shop run by an Asian. One member defecates on the floor and leaves the owner terrorised and humiliated, and warned they will return whenever they feel like for cigarettes, drink and sweets.

The film climax follows the rejection of Combo by the girl friend of the former gang leader and unfortunately the person he next encounters is the mixed race lad and his girl friend. He is persuaded to leave the girl to go home on her own while he goes for dope for the new group but then all the anger and frustration of the recent rejection, and the earlier rejections of his life comes to the fore and he explodes battering the mixed race lad to death and turns on his other friends including Thomas. This is the turning point for Thomas and the audience is left believing that the relationship with his mother has returned to that before the death of his father and that he is rejecting the extremes of the life recently experienced. However this films deals with reality of their lives and we know he will be very lucky if he is able to break away into a different life, given the neighbourhood where they live and the school he attends. The boy's mother died of cancer during the making of the film and she was only able to see a small portion before her death. The firm maker dedicated the film to her and Thomas received a most promising newcomer award. The film was shot on estates in Nottingham and in Grimsby, the actual home town of Thomas. Because of overt racism, the violence and the language. the film was given an eighteen rating which meant that Thomas and teenagers in general were unable to see the film at public performance. Three Councils, two in London decided to overturn the rating to enable local teenagers to view the film, although how far they would influenced in a positive way is questionable.
11.11.30 pm note making. Half sandwich supper.

11.40pm- 1.30 am Play Hearts then confidential Correspondence and MySpace

1375 A concert in Rome, Reality TV, some politics and the History of Mr Poly

Friday May 14th 2008 became an unexpectedly enjoyable day. The morning commenced late with very fine drizzle outside which aptly expressed my state after the exertions of the previous afternoon. The main problem was from bending at the knee rather than bending down and underlined the lack of exercise and the onset of physical old age, which I will have to counter. I know some things are or become irreversible but it is important to try. When late in the afternoon I walked to the supermarket there was a noticeable stiffness in my thighs and I had intended to have a hot bath but forgot to turn on the water heater. Perhaps tomorrow,?

I begin with a WOW event. I did not visit the Circus Maximus on foot during my brief visits to Rome separated by over three decades although the area was pointed out on an organised coach visit after the Millennium. The Circus Maximus was the first and biggest circus area which can be ignored by the casual visitor with limited time because it is such a vast open area but I had not grasped the number which can be accommodated with 250000 in the days of the Caesars with a similar number having a mor distant view from the surrounding hills. When Italy won the World Cup in 2006 it was estimated that nearly three quarters of a million people packed the area in celebration. Last year Genesis were the group chosen to give a free concert and over half a million people attended with a giant stage and super structure. It was an amazing event now captured on video/DVD. I have several records by Phil Collins and have seen perform live at Newcastle City Hall as well as enjoyed his film career. It is always good to see that an old un can still do it.

I missed Britain's got talent on Saturday and waited until tonight for the re run and for someone who could become the series winner produced another WOW from my lips. This time is was a twelve year old girl with an extraordinary mature deep embryonic operatic voice. I did not note her name. She attended the Birmingham Britain's got talent and has a mum who is an hairdresser and a father who is a Health and Safety Officer. The girl admitted she practiced for hours in her bedroom with her parents giving her encouragement. It sounded as if her singing teacher school may have suggested she should enter the competition. She was both excited and then nervous and I predict that one day she will sing at Covent Garden, the Metropolitan and Milan and anywhere else she chooses to if that is what he decides is to be her destiny.

The second American Idol saw the obvious become reality and David Cook and David Aucheleta will contest the final next week seeing Seyesha Mercardo placed third but with over million votes recorded all three can record and know they will sell a million albums. All three returned to their home states and towns in trips organised by the local Fox broadcasting to an adoration level which has reached hysterical proportions as only the USA can do. This is not a criticism. When Americans are enthusiastic boy they are enthusiastic and there is a unity of purpose which is remarkable given the diversity of ethnic origins, cultures, religions and non religions and extremes of political and social viewpoints. It is understandable and a pity that the accumulated energy is sometimes misdirected.

The main purpose of the visit to the supermarket was for new razors but I went to see what there was in gardening pots and discovered some very expensive black containers some rounded shaped other squared which are pleasing to the eye and the ideal size for the window ledge The four square ones were placed on the window ledge outside the working window with geraniums. and the five rounded were used for the upright fuchsia's and placed on the day room window ledge and the table. I had a sufficient mix of potting compost to complete this task. However I had also been unable resist some wicker hanging baskets with a sacking liner which will require further investment in plants and some compost, which I will leave to next discount Wednesday, although it is tempting to go beforehand.

Friday is traditional fish eating day for but I had forgotten to defrost so during the day I separated the bream and also cut the salmon and tuna slices from the fish platter and will have one half tomorrow. Later I defrosted prawns to go with a salad. Today I had had salmon steaks in tomato sauce from an inexpensive flat tin which was part of the day's enjoyment and this evening peppered steak with vegetables followed by apple strudel and ice cream. I must remember to note the wine before the bottle ends.

I watched Distant Drums yesterday, a vehicles for Gary Cooper as a backwoodsman fighting an uprising in the Florida jungle and trying to rescue is half Indian son. Today I watched the History of Mr Polly, the H D Wells amoral tale of Polly as he progresses from an inability to work for others until he is left a princely sum by his father and gets married to a cousin and opens a shop. He soon tires of both although given the poverty of the time he behaviour was rightly condemned by society. John Mills portrays the character as a weak, harmless romantic, who ends up accept a job as a thatched covered Inn on a river bank with a punt ferry punt in pre car Victorian England. The challenge is the a criminal thug relative of the Innkeeper, a good woman looking after the child of his sister and of the thug. But like all bullies he in such films justice prevails and by good fortune because he is wearing a pair of Mr Polly's trousers, when Polly returns to find out how is former wife is getting on, he finds that she has been declared a widow and is enjoying life having turned the first floor of their former home above the shop into a tea room which she is running successfully with one of her sisters. He returns to his rural idyll with a cleared conscience. Oh if life was really like that!

As anticipated the political talk was on the fight back of Prime Minister Brown after being attacked by about everyone from the Opposition parties and the media, to sections of his own party and one suspects members of his own Cabinet. All talk of Cabinet reshuffle appears to have temporarily ended as he cannot risk creating a rivals and rebellion leaders. The truth was revealed by Ms Diane Abbot who after being part of the downfall of Tony Blair and years of public carping criticism has been extraordinarily uncritical of Gordon Brown, especially on the issue of the General Election that was not and the 10 pence tax abolition. Last night she admitted that there was no one who could take over and command support within the party or the country, so the factions will jockey for position and influence and plot the succession if as must be anticipated the party loses the next election. It is possible for parties in mid government to regain the initiative and public support but the political mood has changed from concentrating around the centre and there is a move to the extremes in England especially with Scotland, Wales and Northern Ireland having the safety valve of their own forms of Parliament and self government. England is left with a large cosmopolitan population in its capital and other cities and some town which is alien to the population who enjoy the country shows and rural pursuits and how we operate our Parliament, administration and judicial system. We actually liked as well as were good at running an empire which covered a quarter of the people on the planet, of ruling the high seas and of coming through as victors in two world wars. We are now part of a very different world and power economy where others have taken over our role and the basis of our economic fortune, and yet there is something in the native British character which adapts, has the drive and the initiative to remain powerful and rich. It is this quality which he post Thatcher governments squandered until Tony Blair and which I though Gordon Brown was up to. There were signs in during the crisis which arose upon appointment a year ago and over the past week that he has the strength of personal will and political purpose to survive and win through but he cannot afford a third mistake. The political hope is that energy and food prices will bottom out for time to make rank and file support fear the Conservative alternative, or for the Conservatives slip up or for forces within their party to attempt to push the leader in a different direction from that being taken. Equally there is a risk that Labour back benchers on the traditional left as well as the pro Blairites will create such havoc behind the scenes which will spill out as usual and destroy the last chance saloon position. Thursday's late night political review was an extraordinary mixture with Bruce Forsythe and Les Denise and Lord Levy. The theme was the need for political decorum and good manners something which the political classes jettisoned two decades ago and can never be recaptured. Unlike Wales, Scotland and Ireland, England in its present form is doomed and that will be the legacy of the last decade of government.

1374 The Patio and some TV

My body is tired from a day of unusual physical activity and my brain is numb. I want to write but I allow myself to be distracted. The cause of this condition was not a long walk or prolonged activity but a solid day of giving the small patio and garage areas a thorough pre summer clean and planting. There was time ton watch a film Distant Drums I think but I retain some images, to catch up with missed viewing, Waking the Dead a two parter and Doctor Who, some cricket and the midday and late night political programmes which merit further comment. I also did a work sort out, knowing that I fallen way behind the achieved target of the previous two months but may at least manage an average of 100 new work sets a months for the last three, which is the lowest number planned for the remaining year.

First however more about the patio and garage area which was in two parts. The main part was to nearly completing the planting; nearly because I bought more plants than containers and may acquire some more from a visit to Asda later as I need some new razor blades as the set I acquired last time has been a disaster and is scrape with the consequences of cuts. First before than some toast having gulped coffee which brings indigestion. Usually I write later into the night and correct and rewrite first thing mornings, but it is already 10.40 the following morning so I rely more on memory than usual and on getting what I want say right first go and an order of significance to me.

I created the base of the patio (when) with red textured flagstones separated by redee, purplish tinged grey chippings cover the whole area and a concrete ridge which has the effect of surface water moving towards the first of two outside open grill drain points, with the second the other side of the back door and which takes water from the kitchen sink and the washing machine as well as the. garage roof. (I have allowed the toast to harden so am liberal with the spread to compensate which reminds of the two submarine mariners Tyrone Power and Dana Andrews as they returned from a tour under the waves and ordered, fresh milk, fresh vegetables, fruit and lashings of butter in quantities which would have been regarded as obscene in the UK as we survived on powdered milk without tropical or Mediterranean fruits and vegetables.)

I have four giant pottery tubs. (I must create a 101 photo album) of a redee bluee mauve. The first has my pride and joy a large nameless evergreen which has more than doubled in size since it was rescued from its neglected condition while the house was attempted to be sold over a year. Its base has become tree like divided into two with a present height of 62 inches and a spread approaching 47 inches. The second evergreen was of smaller size but the differential has increase so that it is about half the size of the other but with a similar spread and wider leaves, but has remained sickly and requires constant attention but again looks amazing given its inherited parlous state.

The two other plantings in the big container tell a different story. I bought the Hydrangea Blue Lace cap lat into the its season June October because of the unusual nature of its flowers, but they have never reproduced in the same way since and I have promised to find out more about the plant which I have kept in partial shade and well watered, and which in theory should grow in height and width. The failure this season and tis mine and mine alone is the most expensive of the purchases a standard Fuchsia Red Tyrol acquired for £14.98 and provide a magnificent feast of continuous colour until the autumn. Alas although I did read the instructions and had planned to move into the garage covered area, I forgot and the late spring frosts may have killed the plant although there are some slight signs of life towards the base. I have transferred to a small pot contained and replaced with a new Evergreen, an Aucuba Crontonfolia, a bushy plant with large leaves of bright green and bold golden yellow variegations. It should also teach 60 inches with a 48 inch spread.

I now have five hanging baskets, two inherited and three acquired. The inherited are attractive to look at, located adjacent to each other on house and side wall with attractive metal brackets. The three new ones ate of green plastic and came full of flowering red and mauve trailing petunias last year. These baskets hang from the cross wood guttering which marks the end of the garage on inserted hooks from which was previously hung a large green canvass awning which when dropped full length obscured the garage area from view as well as from raid and wind. It is now used from the an end hook up to cover the wheelie bun and the redundant refrigerator. More on the garage area later,

This year I have change the colour scheme of two of the green plastic baskets to yellow, with trailing Petunias Surfinia Victorian Yellow and which also contain one Chrysanthemum Firecracker. The three other baskets are packed with Surfinia Double Purpose Petunia.

I have three bronze coloured metal window ledge containers each with carrying handles and one of these is packed with Snapdragons La Bella Yellow and the other two with Upright Fuchsia Winston Churchill red and mauve.

This leaves my other pots and one long plastic blue contained which forms the end of large white garden tabled with sits under the garage roof and when I sometime eat a meal or sit and work in whatever space is free. I have a mixture of pots and plants. I have green pots with green pottery sauces although some are green or blue plastic and three posts of different sizes but of similar contemporary design of white stone with geometric glass like inserts. In one of these I have I am trying a Perennial Lupin Gallery White. I am also trying a Celosia Venezuela with mauve feathery flowers which are already bringing colour to the table along with the peaking Chrysanthemum. The long smoky blue container is full of yellow snap dragons, the peaking Chrysanths and training Petunia which should as last year hang over the container and table end. I have a large upright Geranium Tango Neon Purple in addition to a tray of other uprights Bullseye Cherry where I need more pots to fit on the window ledge. Two pot geraniums survived from last year and two of the smaller ones are already potted and on the table. I also have three other survivors of last year. One post is full of green shoots some six inches in height but what are they ? And there are two other plants from two years ago whose name is on the tip of my tongue but which a quick look at a photo gardening book failed to identify.

Yesterday's work including scrubbing the flagstone, removing weather debris from the chippings and then cleaning out the fridge to make into a store and then cleaning out one of the drains. The spring bulb collection was sorted and put under the table for the greenery to dry and decay. Need to clean and attend to the side of the garage where I have a shelf with plates and goblets and then the frame of pictures. The floor requires a good scrubs but I will defer repainting until next year or the year after as although the blue has faded, the surplus paint from my former home should last until then. I will leave this until later or tomorrow as I want to make progress elsewhere.

I was able catch up the TV as the audio driver arrived although I had difficulty working out how to run and need to ring back the agents who have proved to be exceptionally helpful. I still have reservations about this series of Dr Who but its simple message that violence begets violence was well scripted and acted. Waking the Dead was also interesting with theme of the power of beliefs and guilt when the demons of darkest fears within are released. In this instance white man's corruption of the ancient Navaho culture. However as with the series so far the underlying issue was the relationship between father and estranged drug taking son, whose death from an overdose is announced as the programme ends after Trevor Eve has brought some comfort to the son of the principle murder victim. It was also semi final night when David Cook stole the march on David Aucheleta and both at the expense of Seyesha Mercardo although I thought she put up a great fight. I will leave the politics until tomorrow

1373 Disasters abroad and Politics at home plus To serve them all my days and the Winslow Boy

The media and consequential public response to the natural disasters in China and Burma could not have more different. The failure of the Burmese to allow foreign news media and aid agencies into their country had turned interest away and all the indications are that as a consequence starvation, lack of water and safe sanitation will kill hundreds of thousands more. To-day I watched the horror as the full extent of Chinese earthquake has been revealed because Western journalists and camera men have been taken to the worst hit areas and allowed to report freely and although the government has directed vast resources of rescue and aid workers and materials it has accepted the need for external help and perhaps more important the understanding and sharing of the grief. We all cry and feel helpless.

Yesterday the Brown Government launched its defence by reversing its policy on taxation by borrowing more and going beyond its 40% ceiling originally set by Ken Clark. And was Ken Clark's approach which the government followed over its first two years reducing borrowing substantially and repaying previous debts. Then with the Millennium the strategy changed with increases in taxation and public spending and pushing the borrowing towards the ceiling it had set. For the first time in a decade inflation has breached 3% and worse is to come as warned by the head of the Bank of England. The ten years of stability have come to an end and a bumpy ride is forecast. I suspect any government would have had to face similar problems although one suspects the kitty was used up in order to win the last election and to sustain the Prime Minister after the recent shaky period
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Two months earlier that planned and again just before the by-election the Prime Minister decided to bring forward the announcement of a new legislative programme which will be announced by the Queen when she opens the next session of Parliament. Once upon a time the legislation programme was announced once a year by the Queen when the Commons attend the Lords. Now it is done in the Commons first, Similarly the budget was a once a year activity often with measure which came into effect the following financial year, Now there is an autumn statement of how the year has progressed and this year the work of the previous budget has been undone. So whatever the spin is put on the activity the rest of the country know what is going on and does not believe what is being said. Before stating what would be in the next programme the Prime Minister, affectionately known as the Supreme Leader, announced that some £200 million of existing money would be redirected to buy unsold new homes and rent them to social tenants. On the basis of £200000 a home this is 1000 homes and therefore an inconsequential amount in terms of social housing need but it will help the building trade. There is also £100 million for shared equity schemes for first time buyers, thus another 1000 new home owners. Something is better than nothing but a pathetic gesture in terms of unmet need.
Most of the legislations sounds good and necessary and the overall package appears to be a good one. Whether it will quell unrest at Westminster and within the Labour party in general remains to be seen. The extreme left, the pro Blair and the anti Brown factions will regard this as open season knowing hat he may well make concessions that risk a challenge to his leadership or defeat on government business which will amount to a vote of no confidence.

I approve of the business rate surcharge proposal to pay for local economic development. There is an interesting piece of legislation designed to open up some coastal areas for leisurely development. However how will this work if the private landowner is opposed to any public development? Will the Heritage Protection Bill aim to open up projects to wider community interest and involvement or will the upper class nature of the management remain? A new Education Bill to end the poorest performing schools and promote fair access cannot work because the good parents will do what is required to provide the best education for he children while a significant section will be indifferent. The Equality Bill sounds good but is misnamed because it is primarily about anti discrimination measures. All women short lists by political parties is good. Concerned if right to criticise, including to make fun is eroded. Further measures to reduce long term dependency on benefits sounds good if new training opportunities are implemented and the skills assessment is of good quality. New Police Bill will provide for the direct election to Police Committees rather than nomination from controlling political parties. Measures to control anti social behaviour should be interesting and Councils will have to work out that they cannot create binge drinking clubs and bards and then shut them down by imposing new control on binge drinking in public places, You tackle the cause not the symptoms. Cutting red tape re police is also a two edged sword.

Transport Security sounds interesting with new measures to act in relation to piracy and terrorism. New measures to enable gathering and storing of internet data in relation to serious crime which includes terrorism. The Law Reform measures also sound positive and I like the idea of promoting Citizenship especially among new arrivals, I also, like the idea of introducing Performance Pay to Hospitals especially if staff will be penalised for the number of patients who die because of secondary infections. The Constitutional Bill also has some interesting aspects taking away personal patronage and political bias. The Community empowerment Bill will be interesting in terms of the inherent conflict between the party political control of local government, There is also what appears to be a technical Bill of minor significance concerned with the Geneva Convention but which is said to provide protection to UN workers who move into difficult places.

There is to be a measure to improve the position of part time and sessional workers also this is double edged as any improvements for these workers will be used as the spring board to press for inflation breaking pay rises for everyone else.

There are two new measures about which I can have a moan. The Banking Bill will be designed to prevent what happened in relation to the Northern Rock but appears to do nothing to deal with the greed of bankers and their incompetence which has caused the crisis and plunged capitalism into crisis. The British and American Governments in particular are talking as if the forces at work are mystical and alien whereas they are were first pointed out by Jesus Christ some 2000 years ago, It is not rocket science. If you lend money to people who cannot pay it back in the hope of charging higher than usual interest you will just accumulate bad debt, The loss should be borne by the bankers personally but instead they draw ever higher salaries and bonuses.

The next legislation is also nonsense in that there is to be Bill to help the least able to save called the Savings Gateway Bill. How on earth are those with least wealth able to save and why should they, unless of course this is another move to reduce the support structure of the welfare state. You had better save even if this puts you in a worse position than before because we have measure up out sleeve which will make you even worse off. However it could be helpful if you are allowed to cash the savings in quickly. I can see a whole new enterprise. I give a poor person £100 pounds top save and the government gives them another £100. I then cash in the savings and give the poor person £25 for his trouble and I make £75 profit from the government the deal

There is one measure which interests me greatly. This is the Coroners and death certification Bill which will create a pattern of full time Coroners and the right of appeal given to bereaved families. There will new medical examiners to examine the cause of death given by doctors,

And now for a complete change in mood and subject. I had planned to make an early first visit to B and Q for by summer season planting combined with some food shopping but then decided to postpone until after lunch hen I learn of the Prime Minister's speech following Question Time and which therefore postponed some of the sting that Cameron would have been able to draw. I then stayed home even longer listening to an episode of To Serve them all my days, the R F Delderfield story which has been turned into radio and TV series since its publication in 1972. I have not read the book but enjoyed the TV mini series with 13 parts and a running time of over 11 hours. While the work is centred on a minor public school it covers the political and social changes between the end of World War and the commencement of World War 2, following the life and teaching career of a miner's son who is commissioned, injured and shell shocked and becomes a popular teacher and eventually the school head, battling a colleague early on and then an authoritarian new Headmaster, losing his first wife and family, losing a potential second partner to another only to find later that the son she bore was his, and finding happiness with a prospective Labour Member of Parliament who joins him at the school as his second wife and a teacher.

Another film which also follows life in a public school from a teacher viewpoint is Goodbye Mr Chips, based on the James Hilton novel first published in an evangelical newspaper in 1934. The book and film follows the long career of Arthur Chipping and like To serve them all my days, covers the political and social changes from the Franco Prussian War of 1870 through to the rise of Hitler in Germany, Retiring at sixty five he is called back to fill during World War I and is deeply affected by the loss of pupils, including a former Austrian master who dies while fighting for the other side. I prefer the 1939 film which stared a young John Mills, Robert Donat, Greer Garson and Paul Henried. In 1969 the book was turned into a musical film staring Peter O'Toole and Petula Clark and music by John Williams and Andre Previn and his wife. In 1984 there was a TV mini series with Roy Marsden and in 2002 Martin Clunes was the star of a made for TV film and this is a less sentimental version than the original film

I have been fascinated by public school life since reading the Thomas Hughes novel Tom Brown's School days first published in 1957.The Public School in question is Rugby and the work begins with an idyllic view of village and country life which makes what happens to him at the school that much more horrific. The books centres on bullying by an older boy called Flashman who is defeated and then on Tom's progress with the help of the headmaster and through the friendship of a new boy he is asked to take under his wing they turn into young gentleman, The book has been repeatedly turned into films and TV series with films in 1916, 1940, 1951, and 1971 together with a TV mini series in 1972 and a two hour TV film in 2005

Another film which affect me greatly traversing my childhood and adulthood is The Winslow Boy based on the Terrance Rattigan stage play, a court room drama in which a father fights against the expulsion of his son from a navel college accused of stealing a five shilling postal order. Again my favourite is the film seen in a full cinema in 1946 1947 with Robert Donat and Cedric Hardwicke but I also enjoyed the 1999 version with Nigel Hawthorne.

My interest is such book and films contrasts with the dread I felt about school although I went to a small Catholic Preparatory school between 1944 and 1952 and experienced some success in the first year and a half at the Independent Catholic senior school which included boarders. Now of course I fully understand the cause of the dread and the combination of circumstances which prevented me reaching my scholastic potential.

On Sunday I enjoyed three thick slices of braised beef with Mediterranean stir Fry vegetables and a mixture of small roasted potato cuts and other mixed vegetables. So although I had my roast in a pleasant country pub for a modest £5 I decided yesterday on a second roast meal this time a joint of pork with crackling. It was a mistake to use the grill oven because such was its size that the crackling started to burn before the meat was cooker thus setting of the smoke alarm in the Hallway twice. I eat a portion of vegetables separately and then about a third of the joint with some of the crackling which had been rescued. While to night following the visit to the supermarket I prepared another stir fry concoction following on from last week but adding a portion of courgette and a few slices of tomato to the previous ingredients and enjoyed even more so, looking forward to the second helping tonight. The actual cooking is about a third of that required fro the supermarket version and interestingly as expected the supermarket preparation ahs been reduced in price back to £3 but only the on the basis of buying two. For lunch I had a sandwich of slices of French Salami followed by fresh pineapple and after the main course there was the last banana with custard, and as a late evening snack some water melon and some snap crackle and pop. This was by way of celebrating reaching my first 101 win at Hearts although there were 447 loses

1372 The Duke of Edinborough. On a Clear Day, and Sun

To-day, May 12th 2008 I needed to relax and reflect and get myself back into a working momentum. I watch some films and TV programmes.

The most significant event of the day occurred in Westminster when the Chancellor with the Prime Minister at his side admitted that the decision to abolish the 10 pence tax rate was wrong because of the subsequent political consequences and announced he was borrowing billions of pounds to give all standard tax payers a one off additional tax allowance which be worth about £120. As the opposition pointed out this is a bribe to prevent the significant loss of the bi election caused by the death Gwyneth Dunwoody. I do not expect this to stem the political tide away from the government but it might quell for the moment the pressure on the Prime Minister to give way to a candidate able to compete in the country with the Conservative Leader who is able to walk on water at the present time. However the damaged caused by the publication of books by Lord Levy and former Deputy Leader John Prescott coupled with the threat by Frank Field all built up the pressure in what will appear to have been a panic attack in the country at large. Gordon has got to stop giving the impression he is doing one thing for reasons of national interest and political conviction and then doing the opposite when expedient for his political survival.

Yesterday I watched part of the first part of a portrait of the Duke Edinburgh, Prince Philip, born 1921 of the Danish, Norwegian and Greek Royal households before marrying Princess Elizabeth and the Queen. Unfortunately I fell asleep and missed the end, but this was made up by giving full attention to the second part tonight. He has always been someone who although very different in personalities and interests to me, I have admired. I thought he was guarded and unusually reserved as he drove Trevor MacDonald around the Sandringham estate and where he has taken the lead management responsibility as well as for Buckingham Palace, Windsor and Balmoral, and any other properties owned and managed by monarch and which are separate from those owned and managed by their children and grand children.

The programme was designed to present the picture of the man amazingly active given that he is over 85, that is sixteen years older than me, and who after a long life supporting the Queen in her official functions as the Monarch and with a family four children and grandchildren (great grand children?) and personal interests cannot retire and give his remaining years to doing what he would like and in the way he would like. Such was the price when he married Princess Elizabeth, but never expecting that he would be required to give up his naval career and traditional role as head of the household through the early death of her father. It was also designed to squash once and for all the allegations concerning his relationship with Princess Diana and with her death.

The film yielded some remarkable facts such as that he has made over 200 visits to over sixty countries, about three a year, on his own to the Commonwealth showing the flag in addition to accompany the Queen on her visits. I cannot remember the 100's of organisations where he has agreed to be patron and where the film evidence his unique and direct involvement in their affairs, giving support such as to injured troops and widows and families of those who have died, commiserating with those who have preserved the Cutty Sark and have to start again after the recent fire, reminding of what happened at Windsor castle, and continuing with his promotion of the Duke of Edinburgh award scheme which has affected the lives of several million young people within the Commonwealth. He has also had his own interests from sailing and Polo which he only took up after joining the Royal Family, to his more recent carriage driving, where he has had three falls one of which was shown and where he got up and continued to finish the event. The programme uses the latest portrait by a young fashionable artist which I thought even through camera lens was brilliant and seemed to capture a man of great worldly experience and understanding with a wicked I can't stand those who take themselves too seriously humour. He came across as the kind of man who would get on with John Prescott and Ken Clark). The programmes did not attempt to covers some of the characteristics from his out of context comments which the media loved to use from time to time, to he and the Queen being strong character with their own views and having a traditional view of the man as head of the household and a Gordonstoun view of upbringing bearing in mind his mother was out of his life and appears to have had a distant relationship with him beforehand. Perhaps the insider's knowledge of public polls about him led to what I regard as the unnecessary attempt to portray a good image although I suppose it is required in days when an increasing percentage of the population have no idea of how the Uk and the its Empire has changed during last fifty years. When he married the future Queen Britain headed an Empire Commonwealth of two billion people.

Of similar absorbing interest was a programme about three youngsters whose a parents are sacrificing their own lives to enable their children to achieve their dreams although why the youngsters had dreams and why the parents were making sacrifices in time, money and their own relationships was as interests as whether the youngster would make it in later life. What impressed me about the 12 year old Trombonist who won Young Musician of the Year is how normal he was and how normal and cohesive appeared to be his family. In tonight's programme there was a racing skier, a Wimbledon hopeful and a stage school performer. On the basis of the film I would be surprised if any made international greatness although the young skiers was the most likely

He was a likeable boy with a remarkable family. His father had potential as a skier but his family were unable and possibly unwilling to make the changes which are necessary if someone form GB is to become a professional racing skier. You have to live, train and compete in the Alpine countries and the racing season. To do this his father was giving up lucrative work as a stunt man to live with his son in the villa of friend while his mother looked after their daughter back home. What the parents were doing was to give the son the opportunity to understand what was involved in terms of training and competition if he was to make his dream a reality and what was evident is that despite the financial commitment said to be in the region of £40000 a season in terms of lost income and expenses, the moment the son changed his mind and said he did not want the life or found that he could never be good enough, the family would move on and both parents would know that they had said yes to the dream, and knew that the venture had been a great experience for the family. I hoped the boy make's it where almost no one from the UK has succeeded before. I also hope the efforts of the family will be recognised with popshop to ensure than money is no obstacle.

It may be that the fourteen year old with a single parent mum has the talent and drive to reach the top fifty world tennis players in which to make the kind of living to compensate for spending the great part of the time around the world with all its implications for relationships and family life. He was talented enough to merit a Lawn tennis Association grant of £5000 a year but which was only a token of the costs of training, travelling and accommodation which meant his mother struggling with the financial costs and unable to be with her son when he was competing. The young man frequently loses it on court verbally attacking judges and opponents in such a way that it was evident that this is more than aggressive competitiveness and was a problem which if untreated would end his chances prematurely. There was little evidence in the programme that he would overcome his self destructive temperament before he reached the adult tennis playing world.

Very little also emerged of the talent of the third young person featured although I was confused about the position. My understanding is that this one girl from a family of six girls attends full time an established London stage school with separate theatrical agency involving a daily round trip of three hours, added to which the child receives additional coaching presumably to make up for the lack of natural ability, added to which he mother assisted by he father were managing a cabaret event which involved some or all of the other daughters plus those from the stage school which involved rehearsing during the day and family rehearsing into the early hours in what appeared to be an endless day of activity from dawn until late night. This all appeared to arise because the mother's career as a dancer was abruptly halted through an accident and her belief that if she kept her daughters fully occupied they would not become teenage mothers, a misguided recipe like to have the opposite effect because if I was the any of lasses in question I would get myself pregnant to escape from the life my parents were imposing upon me. This may sound hard but what the young girl communicated is that she was doing all this not because she enjoyed it or wanted to be the best at it, but because she wanted to be famous and have a better life than she could otherwise expect. She was shown doing some work involving an acting photo shoot for one of those comic like books picture books which some parents allow their daughters to read rather than literature. I appreciate that in order to fulfil potential one has to work hard but the evidence is that one needs to be an educationally and culturally rounded individual if you going to reach the top and sustain our position. I feared for the future of this girl and her sisters.

On a clear day was the most enjoyable of the three films which followed on from the Full Monty in following how one man made redundant from a ship yard after three and half decades faced up to the rest of his life and hit on swimming from Dover to Calais as a form of Atonement for being unable to save one of his sons from drowning two decades before. This was not however a film about following a dream regardless of the cost but an attempt to find a future for himself and re-establish relationships with his son and grand children. Billy Boyd of the Lord of the Rings played his natural self as a friend from work, as did Brenda Blethyn as his wife who passed her bus driving test at a third attempt. This film is a blatant attempt to reassure the working class that they can survive the occupational mobility require by Britain's changing position in the world, but also did not shirk from showing something of the reality of doing so. It is a better film than some critics gave credit and the characters were honest with integrity and with some depth, despite the feel good ending.

A very different film was Sun directed by the Russian Alexander Sokurov and part of a trilogy which looks closely into the personalities of Hitler, Stalin and Emperor Hirohito. It is a dark film in Japanese and attempts to get into soul of the man who was treated by his people as divine in the days before the use of atomic weapons (critic Mark Leaper showed his age by referring to nuclear) he was forced to spend his time in the bunker as the allies had successfully bombed the rest of his palace except for the equally fortified marine biology lab which was his interest. Although regarded as a God the portrait was of a man restricted and controlled by the ritual and outlook of the military and upper class establishment. With the film's Director making an interesting that Japan was a different culture from the rest of Asia just as Britain is from the rest of Europe because of our Island geographies, although as mentioned earlier it should never be underestimated the impact of the UK Britain effectively controlling a quarter of the world population from Queen Victoria through to the second world war.

I was struck by the differences in British approach to the German, Japanese and Russian Military in the second world war. The professional solders, airman and sailors of German were held in the highest esteem by British armed service professional throughout both world wars because they followed the same code. There was little respect of the Russians who used their population as cannon fodder and where the Japanese were regarded warrior fanatics, prepared to kill themselves than be dishonoured by capture. In this fil as in other and some histories, the Emperor is portrayed as a childlike innocent more interested in marine biology than what his generals were doing and imprisoned by a culture which regarded him as a God who had to eb protected to last drop of Japanese blood. I learnt that some historians have argued he was much more in control and willing supporter of Japanese imperialism than has been presented since his surrendeer to General McArthur.

The third film was also about World War 2 and unashamedly propogandist but designed for home consumption than influencing the enemy. The first message was that all branches of the American forces had essential parts to play in a whole team effort required if the war was to be won, and as insufficient point was made throughout the film Tyrone Power explains this in detail to the audience as the film ends. The second message was that the war task meant that men had to avoid emotional entanglements which might upset their ability to focus on their war jobs and for women to play fair and be loyal while their men were away and provide uncomplicated love and security when they came home on leave or at the end of hostilities. There was also a third message that if given the choice the older man should be prepared to sacrifice themselves for the younger, and a fourth that the previous standards and methods of warfare had to be put aside as the enemy was capable of using any and all means to win and that great courage and skill would be necessary by American forces. But the message was also optimistic in that follow the recipe and you will be successful in the war and come home to love of your life and the love of your family and the respect of your community.

1371 The Seach for me

May11th 2008 has been a leisurely morning with much reflection before making a key stroke.

I have been much preoccupied with tying to find any evidence of my early years to substantiate a memory which requires accurate triggers to bring about recall and I so regret not keeping basic records or a diary from when I was in a position to do so. I have written that sometime between the ages of eight and eleven I was taken to what I now believe was either a family group home or a foster home. I remember that I had a case with me and being left there and that I was made welcome and the place was warm and well furnished in comparison to what I was used to. What I cannot remember is if I actually stayed but if so it would not have been for more than a night or two ,but as when I was taken to be admitted to a hospital to have my adenoids and tonsils removed, I was able to plead why my care mother and did not stay and returned to our home. However as a consequence of this and through the intervention of the local Member of Parliament my birth mother, my care mother and their elder sister were rehoused by the local housing authority in a war time requisitioned property close to where I lived for the greater part of my life to that time. We were allocated the top floor of the detached house and a former RAF serviceman and his wife occupied the ground floor and we shared the garden which my birth mother loved to upkeep. This was only a temporary solution.

Wallington was part of a borough with Beddington and where a large park separated the two communities. Wallington was then a sleepy town where there was a tea room but no restaurants, a few of public houses and a small cinema which did not show the current releases, but which was in retrospective an advantage because it meant that I was able to see films from the twenties, thirties and forties as well as going to neighbouring towns of Croydon, Purley and Sutton to see contemporary films at weekends. There were two roads of shops, one Stafford Road, which connected Wallington with Sutton and Croydon had shops from Mellows Park and the school where my birth mother worked for twenty years down past the Catholic Church we attended and Police station, past the Public house to a junction of the second main road which southward was the main shopping area, with the Town Hall and Library, and the cinema just before a dip in the road under the railway station bridge. and then to Hackbridge of Beddington and onward to Mitcham and central London.

On the geographical southern side of Stafford Road, was a vast area of private residential housing with gardens and where along Woodcote Road from the junction with the main shopping Road, there were increasingly larger properties as one went towards Purley and joined the main London road to Brighton and the South coast. It was therefore to the north of Stafford did the local authority managed any public sector house and there were a few council houses tucked away, although there was more across Beddington Park in Hackbridge. There were no blocks of public housing flats. Because of bombings there were vacant sites many still craters. In an area past the telephone exchange and post office and the fire station accessed by a small bridge over the railway was Bute Road which led down to the council housing and Beddington Park. Here about a third of way along was a large site upon which the Council its first new public housing since the war in the early 1950's, two blocks of three storey flats, twelve in total, we were allocated a flat on the second floor of the block situated on Bute Road, although the address was Maldon Road and the ex RAF wartime service man and his family the flat adjacent. As both families attended the same Catholic Church they were one of the few non family contacts which my birth and care mothers maintained.

When I left school and commenced to work in central London, often staying on in the evenings or using my monthly travel ticket to return on weekends perhaps to Promenade Concert at the Royal Albert Hall, or to a Soho Jazz Club. or in nearby Oxford Street, I suspect it was arising from conversations between my family and the neighbours which led to attempts to find a suitable girl friend for me, and it was during this period that I was taken in by the neighbour out for a drink one evening, but beforehand we called in at a child care home to deliver some gifts from the parish church and I recognised the place from where I had been taken a decade or close to a decade before. The visit is today of special significance because although the establishment and the application for me to be placed in care was likely to have been made before Children's Department, the National Health Service and the Social Security system came into being, the visit was made several years after Children's department were in being. As my life changed as I became involved with support for civil rights in South Africa, with the peace movement and with War on Want, I have no doubt that my family shared their concerns with much embarrassment and then their relief as I accepted the place at Ruskin College, switched to public and social administration and into child care social work. In fact the husband helped me to transport of my books and clothing at least once or twice for the start and of terms. But then as I settled in very different life as I successfully completed training and commenced my career I lost contact, especially after my family moved as I believed also did our former neighbours
This is by way of background because on Sunday as part of a new Government initiative to discuss the future structure, including financial structure of care in the community, in which the Prime Minister and Health Secretary are leading the discussion, an interview took place with a severely disabled couple continuing to live in their home with the wife suffering from dementia and the husband with visual impairment. A recording of their interview broadcast on BBC news programmes was available on BBC on line and I watched it on my return in amazement as there were indeed the former neighbours and the husband might remember the child care home and where it was located, and possible who it was run by so this particular trail into my early years may not have ended. Life is indeed stranger than fiction.

I tried to make contact through the BBC as did another relative but we received no response or acknowledgement.